Why God Sometimes Withholds What You Ask For — Elder Thaddeus on Prayer
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What the video says
This video presents teachings on prayer, largely attributed to Elder Thaddeus, for an Orthodox Christian audience. It explains that God does not grant every request because He knows what is truly beneficial for our salvation, and urges us to pray for His will to be done. Prayer is described as the breath of the soul, requiring focus of both mind and heart, freedom from worldly cares, and love for others, including enemies.
The video also teaches how to pray for the departed rather than mourn excessively, and emphasizes that true repentance is a rare change of life, not merely confession, requiring continuous struggle and guidance from a spiritual father.
Key moments
- Christ does not answer every prayer because He knows what is most beneficial for us; we should always pray for His will to be done, not ours.
- We should not worry about tomorrow; through prayer we reduce stress, and a life of prayer produces love.
- Prayer is the breath of the soul; fasting and prayer adorn the soul and help us become like Christ. The prayer of Saint Arsenius of Cappadocia is offered for anxiety.
- During prayer, guard your mind, holding only death, the final judgment, hell, and paradise in mind; pray with the heart, not philosophy.
- The Virgin Mary prays unceasingly to her Son for us; let prayer become a habit so the heart reaches a state of unceasing prayer.
- Whoever has love prays for the whole world, not just himself; when we pray for someone we take their pain upon ourselves, and we should love and pray for our enemies.
- Do not mourn excessively for the deceased but pray warmly for them, give their names to priests for commemoration in the Divine Liturgy, and give alms in their name; grief is not fitting for Christians.
- True repentance is rare and is not merely confession to a priest; it is a change and renewal of life, freeing the soul from anxieties and negative thoughts, and the only unforgivable sin is unrepentance.
This post presents a compilation of teachings on prayer attributed to Elder Thaddeus of Vitovnica, the Serbian Orthodox ascetic and spiritual writer of the twentieth century. The central theme is a question that troubles many believers: why does God not answer every prayer? The answer offered is that Christ, in His love, withholds what would harm our salvation, and that we should therefore pray for His will to be done rather than our own.
From there, the video unfolds a fuller vision of the life of prayer. Prayer is called the breath of the soul, requiring attention of both mind and heart, freedom from worldly anxieties, and remembrance of death, judgment, and the eternal things. It is not an exercise in philosophy but a matter of the heart, and through it the soul is adorned and gradually conformed to Christ.
The teachings also stress that prayer must expand beyond oneself: whoever has love prays for the whole world, takes upon himself the pain of those for whom he prays, and even loves and prays for his enemies. The Mother of God is described as praying unceasingly to her Son for us, and believers are encouraged to cultivate prayer as a habit until it becomes unceasing.
Practical guidance follows for those who mourn: excessive grief is not fitting for Christians, who should instead pray warmly for the departed, ask priests to commemorate them at the Divine Liturgy, and give alms in their name. Finally, the video addresses repentance, insisting that true repentance is rare and is not merely confessing sins to a priest; it is a change and renewal of one's whole life, freeing the soul from anxiety and negative thoughts, with unrepentance named as the only unforgivable sin.
The post is promotional in part, offering links to a prayer guide and merchandise, but its substance is a sober, encouraging call to deeper, humbler, and more loving prayer.
Main points
- God does not grant every request because He knows what is truly beneficial for our salvation; pray for His will to be done.
- Prayer is the breath of the soul: pray with the heart, not philosophy, keeping the mind on death, judgment, and the eternal things.
- Love widens prayer: pray for the whole world, bear others' pain, and pray even for enemies.
- For the departed: avoid excessive mourning; instead pray, request Liturgical commemoration, and give alms in their name.
- True repentance is a rare change and renewal of life, not merely confession; only unrepentance remains unforgiven.